In 2007 I did my first ever fire walk. I was at a seminar with about 70 other people, and was not quite sure that I wanted to do it. Our group had prepared and were ready to go. Outside the coals were hot! I stood there on the perimeter watching everyone else do the walk, still with the belief that I wasn’t sure if i would actually do it. Whilst watching, an 82 years young woman called Margaret did the walk! I was in awe, and thought “if she can do it, so can I”.  Lining up for my turn, I was in a very positive mental attitude. The assistant looked me in the eyes, and said GO! Next thing I remember is being at the other end of the fire walk, with absolutely no recollection of walking on the coals. Really! I felt a bit cheated, why couldn’t I remember it. Then the metaphors started surfacing. How often do we put things off because of fear of the unknown? How often does someone inspire us with their bravery, like Margaret did for me? How many hours had I spent preparing, when it was nothing at all?

The next year, I did the fire walk again, twice. Each time, I remembered it. It was emotionally powerful, exhilarating, a place of no-fear, but great joy in knowing that this time it was easier than the first. What metaphors occured for me this time?

Enjoy life. Even if something scared you the first time, don’t be afraid to do it again. Look forward to events with a positive mental attitude . Share with others, as I was able to tell others of my experience. When you have conquered something, the second time around can be much easier/better/knowledgeable.

A wonderful friend recently reminded me of my fire walking experiences. I had surgery in February this year on a tumour in my neck. When I awoke from the surgery, the doctors told me that they had got everything. However, two weeks ago, I had a phone call from my specialist, and he informed me that they didnt get everything after all, the disease has spread, and I need more surgery and treatment.

At first I was upset and angry, then a wonderful friend then reminded me of my fire walking experiences and likened this new development to the surgery. I already know what will happen during and after the surgery, the same as the fire walk. I am able to prepare myself beforehand, the same as the firewalk. Enjoy life. Even if something scared you the first time, don’t be afraid to do it again. Look forward to events with a positive mental attitude. Share with others, as I was able to tell others of my experience. When you have conquered something, the second time around can be much easier/better/knowledgeable. Sound familiar?

These beliefs I will keep with me, especially during the next few months of surgery and treatment. I am grateful for these experiences, and grateful for great friends who remind you of them!

Have an absolutely fantastic day

Helen

but names will never hurt me.

A chant we all know from childhood, and a very well intended belief system. Yet, hard to implement, and harder to believe as the name calling increases, and we often tire of holding up our mental shield to deflect the names and negative taunts.

There comes a time to most of us that the “name calling” will hurt. It can hurt because we see the value in what is being said and it challenges us to think that not everything about ourselves is perfect. Other times it can hurt that not everyone sees us as the perfect/wonderful creatures that we are. For example: I grew up as a very overweight child, and still find the “perfect” weight to be a goal that I strive for. It is something I work on most of my life, and probably will for the rest of it. Almost every time that someone comments on my weight negatively, I can deflect it. Yet, when I am having a day, or time, of self doubt and self recrimination, those taunts are not easy to ignore, and yes, to be honest with you, I feel hurt if I hear them. Most times it is easy to accept that it is THEIR belief system, not mine.

I could look at their comments from the positive point, as encouragement, as acceptance that I am not where I want to be yet, and thank goodness they are pointing out that I have some goals still to attain. Good for you people, tell me more! I accept your encouragement with love, both for yourself and myself.

At the end of the day, it is how I ACCEPT and believe it that makes the difference to ME!

The same belief can be applied to the child that is being bullied at school, taunted on facebook by peers, spoken to by a ex-partner or friend, or what we often say to ourselves.

It is how I ACCEPT and love myself that makes the difference to ME!

Until next time, Love yourself greatly!!!!

Helen

It is the things in life that you don’t do that you will regret, rather than the things that you did do. Yet, so many of us don’t do things for the strangest reasons. What if we did everything we wanted to do, and didn’t let excuses hold us back?

Does just reading that sentence bring up a state of unease in you? Do you immediately start thinking of WHY you can’t do something? Or did you say to yourself…right, let’s rip into it.

The number one reason for not doing what you want is fear. Fear is a very powerful emotion. Sometimes it can be present to protect us from getting hurt, which is a good thing…. “I won’t burn my hand on the kettle, as it will hurt”. What I want you to think about whilst reading this, is - how many times have you had unnecessary fear that stopped you from doing something great?

Often we can be afraid that we will fail. Let me tell you - if you don’t even start it, you have failed at it already.

Others fear what other people will think. They will think I am a food/silly/up myself etc etc. Well, do you place too much worth on their opinion? Maybe they will think these things about you anyway, even if you do it or not. Maybe the won’t even be thinking of at all, and you think yourself so important and they don’t.

Others fear success. What if I achieve what I set out to do, what then? Will more be expected of me? What if I do everything I want and become bored/ have to change my life?

Part of the path to success is knowing what your fears are, what is holding you back. Then you can make decisions. Sometimes it is like the nike expression - Just do it! Sometimes we need to get more information, or assistance, (like a coach!) or knowledge. Sometimes we need to do something else first.

Today, I ask each of you, do something towards your goals that you haven’t done before. Just one thing, one small step. Then tomorrow, do the same, and guess what, the day after that, do it again. In a week’s time, look back and see how far you have come, then look forward and be inspired by the journey ahead.

Lots of successes

Helen

Happy New Year to everyone!!!!!!

Today, I want to share a quote with you: Act the part; walk and talk exactly as if you were already the person you want to be. Brian Tracy

Pause for a minute, and think what this means to you. When I first read this, I thought of the movie My Fair Lady, where the street urchin - played wonderfully by Audrey Hepburn - is tutored and trained to act and talk like a lady, and then is accepted in society as one.

When a person goes into a business meeting, they often wear a suit, and act professional. When an athlete trains, they wear the appropriate work out gear. What do you wear to be the person you want to be?

If you act and talk the way that you want to be, you are already being that person. Not only will other people accept you as that person, but importantly, you will begin to feel that you are. That is the most important factor! You will believe it, and once the belief comes, then the actions increase, and you will get the results you want.

Have a most outstanding day!

Helen

I mentioned the new book out by Mitch Albom - “Have A Little Faith”, and said I was going to buy it that day. He said that he was too, and we talked a bit about Mitch’s other books, especially “Tuesdays With Morrie” and “The Five People You Meet In Heaven”, both of which we had read and enjoyed.

The stranger went and bought my book, then returned for me to sign it for him. He had his copy of Have A Little Faith under his arm. I said casually, “I see you are all ready to read the book”. He smiled, held out the book, and said, “No, I bought this copy for you.”

My amazement was surely shown on my face. An amazing gesture of kindness. He said that he had enjoyed chatting with me, and wanted to buy me my copy of the book. I thanked him exceedingly, still blown away by this remarkable kindness.

Today, I read the book, and realised that my mysterious gift presenter must have already read the book. It touches your soul. It is a true story, a novel, about two men, a rabbi and a drug dealer. That is all I will share with you about the story. GO BUY THE BOOK, and then email me and we can chat about it.

I now want to go out and buy a copy for a stranger! You know that I will..

Kindess is something many people say they have and show, yet to do something without reward - A Random Act of Kindness, is amazing. Something we should do each day, yet few of us do. In giving we receive more back. I mentioned this in the acknowledgements of my own book, saw it in action again, then was reminded of it in this book.

I will quote one paragraph to you that had me truly inspired..it is about different people, different religions, different everything …. “That is the beauty. It’s like being a musician. If you found the note, and you kept hitting that note all the time, you would go nuts. It’s the blending of the different notes that makes the music.”

As we find ourselves in the time of year traditionally set aside for short tempers and even shorter fuses, stop and listen to the music, celebrate the differences.

Helen

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There is a saying, “most people overestimate what they can do in one year, and underestimate what they can do in seven years!” As a society in general, we are after the quick fix, and if we dont get it on the first or second go, “the instant reward” we give up. It’s too hard, I dont have enough time, I’m not smart enough, I dont have enough money, It wasnt meant to be…. These are just excuses for why you dont have, or havent done the things you dreamt about.

As a coach, I work with my clients so they do achieve their desires, goals and dreams. We work together to achieve consistancy, the growth towards these goals, the continuous improvements, the getting back after you have fallen down, the release of your limiting beliefs.

As you ponder what the future holds, dont wait for the midnight bell to toll as Dec 31 leaves and January 1 arrives. Take action today, right now. As you read this, go create a plan, start, take action TODAY! Then keep taking steps towards what you desire. If you need help along the way, reach out and ask, grab it, expand your positive environment, surround yourself with people who believe in you.

Make today the day you begin! Make today the day you increase your actions!

Kind thoughts

Helen

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When you are single and dating, the issue of getting and giving telephone numbers can be confusing.

Does the male ask the female, or is it ok for a girl to ask a bloke?

When do you ring them after getting the number, is the same day too soon, or a week after too late?

How many times should you leave a message that is not returned?

Is it better to send a text or ring?

It’s enough to make you stay single, and never talk to anyone on the phone again!

Yet, there are a few base rules that should be remembered.

Don’t give out your number unless you want the person to call you, and don’t collect a number from someone if you have no intention of ringing them.

It is always better to get their number than it is to give yours out. You have the control of when to ring, rather than waiting for them to ring you.

Ring within 3 days of getting their number. It shows interest. If in doubt ask, “When is the best time to ring you?”

A question for yourself is “Why?” Why do you want to talk to the person on the phone? Make it fun, make it a call that they will remember,  make it a call that they will look forward to repeating.

Ciao

Helen

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The last few weeks have been very busy, and a lot of fun! My books have been printed, and distributed to all those who pre-ordered. Thanking you exceedingly for your orders and support.

Angus and Robertson are also distributing the books in their stores. (or available online at www.thelistbook.net).

I have done 2 book signings already and have another 9 to go this year, in various stores.

Being an avid reader and buyer of books, it was a very humbling and exciting experience being an author at a book signing. Some people come up and talk to you in awe. Some people are interested in how you became an author. Some people want to just chat with you. Some people want to buy the book. Everyone is fascinating. It wasn’t until I packed up on Saturday that I took a second to look around the bookshop.

I love bookshops, the smell, the knowledge of discoveries and adventures within each turning of the page. As I looked around, I saw MY BOOK! on the shelf. It was a very surreal moment. I realised with a rush that my dream had in fact really truly come to fruition. I was an author, I was standing in a book shop, seeing my book on the shelf, seeing people buying it, and benefiting from it.

I immediately said a thanks to the higher power, and a thanks to everyone who made this possible. Whilst being humble, you can still take pride in your achievements.

Here is the hope that everyone of you who buy my book, or tell others about it… enjoy it, benefit from it, take steps from it.

Always, with fondness and caring

Helen

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On New Year’s Eve 2009 will you be saying… “I wish I had done xyz this past year”, or will you be saying “Look at all I have achieved this past year”?

People, I am telling you, be the second voice! Use this next 100 days to do the things that you want to do. Write a list of 100 things, do one a day, and ta da! they will all be done by NYE. Write 200 things, do 2 a day… you get my drift!

Take ACTION now. Do it NOW. Everything that you tell me, or yourselves, or the next door neighbour that you want to get done by the end of the year, you have 100 more days to do it in.

What are you going to do today?

Take care

Helen

This year has been particularly hard on my children. There has been the death of a loved grandfather, a loved great-grandmother and recently, a beloved father.

Last week, I received a phone call from my eldest daughter, begging me for family photographs. I have scanned most of their photos into my computer (see previous blogs), yet recently discovered a new plastic storage container filled with pictures and photos that I forgot about. I am scanning these as I write this blog. It is yet another wonderful trip down memory lane, seeing my now grown children back when they were babies and youngsters. Oh, and seeing how YOUNG I was!

One of the hardest things after the death of a loved one, is going through their possessions, the story of their lives.  My grandmother was 89 when she passed on, and most of her family knew what she wanted done with her treasures. But what about the person who dies of a sudden heart attack, without warning, and young?

On reflection, if we were to suddenly pass on, are our things in order? Would it be a nightmare for our loved ones to sort out our estate, or would it be a trip down memory lane? How prepared are you to make things easy for those you leave behind?

Helen

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